So this is what happened: I went to youth group this weekend, and in the middle of the sermon, my sister has to use the john. She does, and then comes back saying a mentally retarded kid is just sitting outside the door but won't come in. She goes out there, feeling bad for the kid, and eventually, feeling guilty that I didn't 100% indorse her skipping the sermon, I followed. So basically, we stood out there with the kid, who could barely speak and was in a wheelchair, talking to him. Eventually, I go back inside, wanting to catch the rest of the sermon.
Later, our parents pick us up and we start to walk home, when my sister starts talking about how bad she feels for this kid, when I say, "Well, I don't feel that bad for him, because when I asked him why he was out there, he just said, 'It's boring in there'."
All the sudden, my sister goes ballistic, saying that I'm "shallow" and "don't care about mentally retarded kids".
For some reason, being smart makes people automatically label you as indifferent, or less emotional. They mistake intelligence and being objective as being non-caring. That's what my sister did tonight. She made the assumption that I had no feelings for this boy; that I didn't care about him being alone.
But I did, and I did feel bad about him being alone, but I also recognized the fact that it was his choice. He wouldn't be out there if he didn't want to be.
This is what happens with pets in my family too: I'm always the discipliner, the objective person. And for that, my family thinks that I don't love every creature great and small, and that I must have a heart of stone. But I don't. And God dammit I love my dogs! Just because I discipline them does not mean I am heartless. And just because I do not feel guilty about this boy's choice that has nothing to do with me does not mean I do not care about said boy.
Being smart is a lot harder than it looks.
Tirza Reed, Signing out.
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